We've launched the new forums! Read more here

When is it time to just give up the game?

Honestly I'm going through this a bit myself right now. This year is the worst I've played in years and I just can't get things to work together at all. It's probably the most frustrated I've ever been with the game. I think for the first time in years I'm going to take a complete break over winter. No simulator, no practice swings, nothing (well I'll probably still practice putt). THP and golf on TV will be my outlet. Sometimes a person just needs a reset.
 
4 years ago I was a 5 capper. My swing has left me, multiple lessons trying to get it fixed. Problem is muscle memory remembers the bad stuff and I just don't have the time to put into what it takes to fix things. So there were two choices, get frustrated and quit, or just go play and enjoy it. I chose the latter. I can still put together a round in the low 80's here and there, or even a solid 9 holes, but I'm mostly in the 85-88 range every time out.

At the end of the day, what are we playing for? What difference in our lives does the score of our weekend round make? What matters is time with friends and just enjoying the little things in life. Being thankful to be healthy enough to go swing a club outside. You could be a lot worse off, so just be thankful to be healthy enough to be able to go play. I'm sure a lot of folks worse off would give everything they have just to be able to walk, let alone go play golf. Just try and put things in perspective and enjoy the simple things in life while you are still able to.
 
when you've spent 5 minutes plum-bobbing a 3 footer for a hard-fought 9 on the easy par 3 - and it lips out.
 
wubears71 said:
When is it time to just give up the game?

I am playing worse than I ever have in my entire life. Every time I even look at a club my back hurts. I have absolutely no consistency and I feel like I am playing the game right handed even though I am left-handed. I am honestly at the point that it makes me so mad and so furious that I want to back my truck up over my clubs over and over again.

I am getting absolutely zero enjoyment out of the game to the point that I honestly would rather die than play this game right now. Should I just give it up?
Click to expand...

You may have seen my posts where I have quit the game 3 times over the last 12-13 years.

Step away for a while and focus on another hobby. I built crabbing 14' and 16' skiffs for a while.

The golf bug will return.........it always does.
 
Once upon a time, with a body long since gone, I was a 3 handicap. Due to work, family stress, you name it; I found myself playing to a 7 handicap. Not a huge deal, but it didn't please me. On my son's 27th birthday, I went out to play with him and my wife: I actually recall shooting 78 that day, but I was a complete and total A-hole. That was in August of 2004. I decided I would take the rest of the year off.

Funny thing happened, over time I found that I could live without the agravation and didn't miss it that much and found other things (more productive I might add) to occupy my time and they didn't bring me the same disappointment and anger.

Next thing I knew it was August of 2015 and some guys at work convinced me to play in a work related outing. So a year off turned into 11, but oh well.

Now I'm retired...and here I am...LOL

All my best to you and your family.
 
I always take some time off (couple weeks at most) if I'm feeling like this. Golf is supposed to be enjoyable. No sense playing if you just get frustrated and hate life while playing. Also, try not to think so much about playing well. Yes, we all want to shoot a PR every round, but the days I don't care about keeping score are some of the most enjoyable golf rounds I've played.
 
wubears71 said:
When is it time to just give up the game?

I am playing worse than I ever have in my entire life. Every time I even look at a club my back hurts. I have absolutely no consistency and I feel like I am playing the game right handed even though I am left-handed. I am honestly at the point that it makes me so mad and so furious that I want to back my truck up over my clubs over and over again.

I am getting absolutely zero enjoyment out of the game to the point that I honestly would rather die than play this game right now. Should I just give it up?
Click to expand...
Depends on your character and what the game means to you. Golf is not for sissies and whimps. It is just a game and one that 99% of golfers suck at. It is also a game that can physically cause injuries though our ignorance and misinterpretation of the fundamentals and instruction and a lack of understanding of how our bodies actually move and work.
 
wubears71 said:
When is it time to just give up the game?

I am playing worse than I ever have in my entire life. Every time I even look at a club my back hurts. I have absolutely no consistency and I feel like I am playing the game right handed even though I am left-handed. I am honestly at the point that it makes me so mad and so furious that I want to back my truck up over my clubs over and over again.

I am getting absolutely zero enjoyment out of the game to the point that I honestly would rather die than play this game right now. Should I just give it up?
Click to expand...


i'd recommend a break...when you put a lot of rigor into a hobby, it's no longer a hobby...take some time off and see how you feel after a bit...could be a week, could be a month...either way, life's too short to have a hobby you don't enjoy.
 
razaar said:
It is also a game that can physically cause injuries though our ignorance and misinterpretation of the fundamentals and instruction and a lack of understanding of how our bodies actually move and work.
Click to expand...
I took a lesson yesterday specifically telling him that I need to find a way to swing that doesn't hurt. I told him that I don't care if I don't hit it as well, I can try to pick up the slack with the putter or chipping. I had let something creep in that would hurt a person with a good back, much less someone like me with a bad one. We made some changes and the pain is not so bad today as the new normal lately had been after playing. Playing good or bad in pain is definitely time to pause and figure some things out.
 
I’ve never played at a high level. So the thought of walking away is very foreign to me.
I am in a period of back issues related to golf and sky rocketing handicap index. I’m taking a few week break to let the back recover.

Maybe a break is all yoU need to regain your passion for golf.
 
wubears71 said:
I look forward to going every time. Then as soon as I get to the range and I hit a few balls I am not hitting the ball in any consistent direction. The other day when I played and lost 11 balls on four holes and quit. Right now I won’t even play on the course out of fear.
Click to expand...

Clearly, based on your HCP, you are a talented golfer.

I would suggest taking some time off, put the clubs in the basement, and focus on your family. The game is always going to be here. I took about 1.5 years off, and while I am still recovering scoring-wise, I have more passion than I have had since I started playing.
 
i played Sunday and just got no joy. About the 3rd week in a row. today I was hitting some balls at lunch and was stripping it. It hit me that for the first time in weeks my left knee and lower back were not hurting. I was relaxed and just lagging arms through the swing

a point comes when I think we need to step away and let the body and mind heal. when the body is not able to move I think my swing becomes all arms and hands and that spells I want to quit.
 
wubears71 said:
I'm putting the clubs up at least for the rest of this year. The physical toll its taking on my lower back is just too much. It's making me mental too. Unfortunately, it's all I had to look forward to. O well.
Click to expand...

You need Headspace meditation app in your life. You’ll thank me later


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
 
wubears71 said:
When is it time to just give up the game?

I am playing worse than I ever have in my entire life. Every time I even look at a club my back hurts. I have absolutely no consistency and I feel like I am playing the game right handed even though I am left-handed. I am honestly at the point that it makes me so mad and so furious that I want to back my truck up over my clubs over and over again.

I am getting absolutely zero enjoyment out of the game to the point that I honestly would rather die than play this game right now. Should I just give it up?
Click to expand...
Take a break! Golf and everyone here will still be here when you are ready to play again.
If your getting zero enjoyment out of it take a break. Life is way too short to be miserable!
 
May just need a break. My brother couldn't hit the ball to save his life awhile back and took a couple months off. He has played his best golf ever in his few rounds since picking it up and is much less stressed and angry on the course.

If you have back pain try finding a good program to work on it. I was having serious back pain a few years back while playing rugby, got a program from our strength coach from that really helped. It's really similar to a program called the "limber 11" on youtube. The foam roller and massage ball on the glutes and hips was a life saver on my back and got me through that season.
 
Here is the issue...

All I can think about is wanting to play. I want to play at a level that i can at least keep the ball in bounds. If I shoot 90, that's okay. I am so miserable when all I do is top the ball and when I go get hold of one, it's going right or left OB, in a hazard or into the native grass where it cannot be found.

I know it's my back. It's the athlete in me that wants to keep going no matter what. And I get so mad because I cannot. It reminds me of the day when I was 21, had a broken fibula and tibia and every ligament and membrane ripped in my lower leg and I still tried to stand up and get back to the huddle. It's hard being 42 and I can no longer rub some dirt on it and keep it going. It makes me mad - like Daniel Tiger Mad.
eb2756d0d499ac983b9434ea38bbbb40.jpg

It's the first time I've ever had to really consider that my age has finally caught up to me and I just cannot do things I use to.
 
wubears71 said:
Here is the issue...

All I can think about is wanting to play. I want to play at a level that i can at least keep the ball in bounds. If I shoot 90, that's okay. I am so miserable when all I do is top the ball and when I go get hold of one, it's going right or left OB, in a hazard or into the native grass where it cannot be found.

I know it's my back. It's the athlete in me that wants to keep going no matter what. And I get so mad because I cannot. It reminds me of the day when I was 21, had a broken fibula and tibia and every ligament and membrane ripped in my lower leg and I still tried to stand up and get back to the huddle. It's hard being 42 and I can no longer rub some dirt on it and keep it going. It makes me mad - like Daniel Tiger Mad.
View attachment 8961733

It's the first time I've ever had to really consider that my age has finally caught up to me and I just cannot do things I use to.
Click to expand...
That being the case, it sounds more like you just need to take a break long enough to get your back healthy. Is it pulled muscles, or is it a disc/spine problem? Maybe just do some light chipping and putting to keep your short game touch and leave the full swing alone until you're healed up.
 
damn wubears sorry to hear about the golf slump and personal life issues. I hope you can find some enjoyment in golf, and maybe something else as well to help with some coping and healing
 
I would kill if my bad number was a 90. But, I get it, if you're used to being better. I've been playing poorly as well. Have had the chipping yips, too. I am not embarrassed by it. But, it sure screws up your round and head. During these rounds, I wondered what I was doing there. I suggest like others to take some time off and maybe next time out go play a new course while on vacation or just drive another hour to a course you've never played before. In my experience, score is not that important when you are on vacation. You're just happy to check out something new. If you play the same courses you've been playing, there are too many demons waiting to haunt you. Golf is such a mental game.
 
wubears71 said:
This is the only thing I look forward to. That’s why I play. I have no job, am stuck at home with my kids, my wife has cancer and I can’t travel anywhere. This is my only outlet and I can’t even do this right. I don’t know. Maybe I just need to move to SGI clubs and regular shafts.
Click to expand...

You're going through more than most folks do. Of course your ----ing golf game is going to suffer! These are crappy enough times without ones spouse being sick.

As for the kids, I can't relate because I lost my best friends when my boys grew up and moved out on their own. But I suppose being with them 24/7 might have changed my perspective.

Either you can learn to enjoy the "bad" golf you're temporarily playing, or you can't. But trust me, no matter what your hobby might be, it would be tough to enjoy anything with all that other stuff going on.

wubears71 said:
It's the first time I've ever had to really consider that my age has finally caught up to me and I just cannot do things I use to.
Click to expand...

I've seen pictures of your house and yard and your capable of playing a crazy difficult game as a single-digit. I doubt this has anything to do with you losing your edge - at least not a permanent basis.

Whatever you decide, I hope things get better soon for you and your family. When they do, I'd put money on the likelihood of everything else getting back to normal.
 
You normally spin a positive spin. I read this and then look....Wubears….NFW he is posting this....Work on one step at a time....Take a week off. But practice in that week. Get your best stogie and smoke it next round. I can relate to your dilemma. My game has sucked big time...and in the last 2 weeks have played 7 courses which are special but I threw up all over myself....Wake up Wubears better days are coming and I hope they come soon. Blessings for your wife and a speedy recovery.
 
Last edited:
Man, I'm really sorry about your struggles. Maybe some time away to get your life and health back on track is the way to go. I get the body and golf part as I feel the same way. It's been almost two years since I've played a round. After 5 back surgeries last year my body isn't making it fun to swing a club. I hit my second bucket of balls last week and I'm really doubting my future for the game I love. Hang in buddy...
 
My suggestion is to maybe shut golf down for 2020 and consider something outside that has a higher % chance of being rewarding, specifically hiking or bicycling. You get exercise, better than golf, and you may find it more enjoyable.

It is hard to hike or bike wrong unlike the myriad of ways you can hit a golf ball wrong.

Best wishes for you and your wife, hoping for a recovery for her.

Regards
Dave
 
wubears71 said:
This is the only thing I look forward to. That’s why I play. I have no job, am stuck at home with my kids, my wife has cancer and I can’t travel anywhere. This is my only outlet and I can’t even do this right. I don’t know. Maybe I just need to move to SGI clubs and regular shafts.
Click to expand...
I mentioned this in another thread, but I know you have a lot going on right now. I also know you have a big heart. This all sounds like stress and anxiety building up. Do some stretching, meditate some, maybe talk to the doctor about some anti anxiety stuff. The world is a crazy place right now and for those of us that are more empathetic its really tough seeing how people are treating each other out there. On top of that your wife has cancer which is a humongous stressor. Take care of yourself brother.
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Back
Top